The Dream Connection

Do you remember your dreams? Sometimes I do and sometimes I don’t. Earlier this year I was going through a period when I knew that I had dreamt yet had no specific memories when I woke up.

I wanted to recall my dreams again so I signed up for a dreamwork group with Trevor Simpson. The last session in the series of four was last week. Sessions were both interesting and helpful. Before they started I only recalled three or four dreams a month, but over the three months of the group I recalled over 50 dreams, and was able to explore a number of them in depth.

Remembering and exploring my dreams helped me clarify ideas, and provided new perspective on decisions. It also helped me remember that the parts of ourselves we don’t have conscious access to can be amazing, creative and funny.

Your dreams are gifts that you may not know how to open.

In the past I kept a dream journal for several years, using Ira Progoff’s Intensive Journal Method, and the genesis of my novel-in-progress came from a vivid dream I had during a nap one afternoon in 1974, so dreams have been a powerful source of creativity and self-development for me already.

Carl Jung’s work on dreams has also shaped my personal work. Dream Moods has a good overview of Jung’s theories about dreams. Active Imagination is Carl Jung’s tool for expanding dream work and creative work. This article by Lawrence Staples of the Jung Society of Washington, D. C., gives a good explanation and an example of the connection between dreams, active imagination, and creative work.

The list of articles on the International Association for the Study of Dreams website shows the extent of worldwide interest in dreams and some of the research currently being done. The list includes articles on a broad list of topics from the usefulness of problem-solving dreams to dreams of the blind.

Want to know more? Wikipedia has a good overview of Dreams.

Here’s the first description I wrote of the dream that is the seed for my novel:

A young girl wakes from an afternoon nap in the dormitory above the great hall of a dancing school. She is wearing a dancer’s top and practice skirt wrinkled from sleeping. She jumps up and begins to move immediately in response to a call from the hall below. She moves from the dormitory to the balcony above the hall and is dazzled by the light flooding the hall rotunda as the sun sets. The light gives everything warmth: the floor tiles, the fountain, the lush foliage in pots round the interior of the hall, and the small group of dancers waiting to perform the traditional grace dance before the meal.

The girl is suddenly filled with joyousness, with a tingling awareness of life, feeling, and the need to communicate the inexplicable. She runs down the stairs to the rotunda space where a fountain is at the centre of the circle the dancers are forming for the evening thanks dance. She doesn’t wait for the dance leader, simply steps into the circle and gives the signal for all to join hands.

 As the dancers join hands, she feels the circle form and the joy she feels begin to move through everyone in the circle. She has a vision of thanks for the day, gratitude that acknowledges each moment that brought the evening’s meal to them: earth, plowed, then planted, moistened by rain, warmed by sun, fronds of wheat waving gracefully, harvested and ground by the mill, brought in sacks loaded on a patient donkey to the school kitchens where it was mixed, baked, and set by the side of the fountain waiting to be blessed.

The energy she felt and her connection with the dancers let the scenes she saw be seen by others, covered the dancers bodies with a vision of the journey from seed to bread, but she didn’t have either the strength or skill to maintain the vision. She was suddenly returned to the hall, and and sound of water from fountain, as dancers broke from the circle.

She falls, crying, to the tile floor. The other students whisper, waiting to see what would happen to her. She broke the first rule for a student, that a student never leads a dance; only dance masters may lead.

 She overhears two kitchen servants called to the hall by the disturbance, “Ah, she’ll have to leave. She’s forgotten she creates the dance. The illusion took her and she broke down.”

The dance master approaches her, lifts her gently to her feet, and tells her to pack her clothes and prepare to leave immediately. She must wait by the gate for further instructions.

I am still working on unfolding the story and continue to be astonished by the amount of information packed into the dream, and the freshness of it so many years later. The novel is now 30,000 words and still growing.

Join the discussion: Have dreams ever played a part in your writing? Have you tried using active imagination?

 

Dreaming of Community

I’ve discovered I read some favourite authors (Maeve Binchey, Marcia Willet, Katie Fforde ) because of the dream of community that’s often a part of the story. Learning how a character moves from outsider, dispossessed of her old identity through circumstance or choice, and forms a new community, is a tale that never grows old. The community is the context for all the action. I feel silly even mentioning it in a way. Goodness it’s always there, that tension between the individual and the community, the dilemma of being in or out, the challenge of being accepted or winning membership.

How could I have missed this theme?

North American culture emphasizes the individual and individual relationships. The novels often have an element of romance. Family stories are sagas, or comedies, or tragedies with an individual at the centre. Shifting my focus to the community, I see the stories differently; learn new things.

In Vancouver, where I live, recent research revealed that many people in the city feel lonely and disconnected, and yearn for a greater sense of community. We have many immigrants who are far from family, are from across the world or across the country, drawn to the city from another way of life; sometimes people are disconnected from their family for other reasons.

On Monday and Tuesday night this week PBS broadcast Half the Sky: Turning Oppression Into Opportunity for Women Worldwide. The stories from the film are different from the tales told in women’s fiction or Vancouver newspaper articles on urban angst, yet they are about dreams shared by the characters in the books and Vancouverites: a woman’s desire for a better life for herself and her children, freedom from emotional and physical abuse, access to education, and a way to earn a living with dignity that will allow her to build a better life and a safe place to belong. The stories of these women are also about the dream of community. The women who take action in the film are able to build community.

Our idea of community, and how to build and maintain a community comes from our dream of it, our yearning for it, as much as it comes from experience.

In 2008 Peter Block wrote Community: The Structure of Belonging.

“Community offers the promise of belonging and calls for us to acknowledge our interdependence. To belong is to act as an investor, owner, and creator of this place. To be welcome, even if we are strangers. As if we came to this place and are affirmed for that choice.”

He emphasizes the need for us all to take up this work, to move from longing to acting, and offers information on building local context and operating guidelines. One of the powerful questions he asks is

“What declaration of possibility can you make that has the power to transform the community and inspire you?

Join the conversation: Do you dream of community? How would you answer Peter Block’s question? What are the characteristics of the community you long for? Share a description of community that inspires you.

 

Finding Power for a Strong Finish

New paper, pens and books, and a fresh start every year for more than two decades means September brings me a rush of energy and a feeling of excitement even though I am no longer in school. My curiosity is strong and I can’t wait to see what’s coming, to meet old friends and discover new ones. The beauty of this, now that I work on a different schedule, one more oriented to the calendar year, is it gives me a boost of energy to finish projects, reach goals, and tackle year-end challenges.

Making this Time Matter

Each year I set eight to ten goals for the year; they’re the dreams I’ve committed to realizing. Each quarter I review progress. Now I am a month away from my third quarter review. So far I am doing pretty well with five out of the nine goals for the year, but I know I am going to have to bring more focus and energy to the four that I haven’t made much progress on if I am going to achieve them this year.

Goal Review Checklist

Before I revision my plan for the last four months of the year I use this list to ensure I’ll use my time and energy wisely.

  • Is this still an important goal for this year?
  • Do I have the resources I need to complete it? (time, tools, information, network)
  • Do I need to modify it in some way based on activity so far this year?
  • What impact will completing this goal have on other goals; on my purpose?
  • What values will the work to complete this goal cultivate?
  • If I haven’t started, why not?
  • What are the obstacles? How can I remove or minimize them?
  • What are the supports? How can I leverage them?

September’s Back to School Energy

Before we went back to school we gathered supplies, shifted from summer’s more casual clothes, savoured our last days of freedom, and geared up for challenge and changes ahead. Prepare for the last third of the year with the same sense of occasion:

  • Pull together what you’ll need to finish
  • Find an everyday symbol of rededication to the goal
  • Give yourself some time to savour what you have right now; let it nourish and refresh you
  • Signal a fresh start
  • Pace yourself for a strong finish by the end of the year

Publish Your 2012 Goals

Here are the four goals I need to focus on to finish 2012 with a ticker-tape parade:

  • Complete Story Is a State of Mind, Sarah Selecky’s great online short story course. Find out more here: http://www.storyisastateofmind.com
  • Restart my exercise routine
  • Complete the first draft of my novel
  • Publish an article or story

Okay, over to you. Where do you find extra power to help you finish? What do you want to accomplish before January 1, 2013? Letting folks know what you are working on can provide more motivation and accountability.

Join the discussion: Let us know your power-finish tips, and your goals. Give us updates on your progress here.

 

10 Steps to a New Beginning

 

My new beginning began when I left the Regional HR Manager position at Capers in 2008 after the merger with Whole Foods Markets. I began doing some HR consulting for small businesses shortly afterward. It was a big change.

Finding the new beginning

After several years of experience as an HR Consultant and a lot of thinking, I decided to “retire” from HR. HR best practices remain part of my tool kit. I am still a CHRP, but now my focus is on writing, consulting, facilitation, and developing programs.

Here’s my learning from my transition; may it help you find a way to realizing your dream!

10 Steps to Prepare a New Beginning

1. Realize transition is a process and not an event.

I thought the transition happened when I left my old position, but I discovered that the process started before I left and continued for a long time afterwards. Trying new things and reflecting on what I enjoyed and did well was helpful. What do you want to continue to do? When do you feel great? What are you doing when you have your most enjoyable, most stimulating interactions with others?

2. Celebrate What You Achieved and Mourn What Is Passing Away

Appreciate where you have been and reflect on what it provides for your new beginning. What knowledge, skills, experience, insights, and connections did you find? What will you be sad to leave? What is unlikely to come again? Acknowledging what I lived helped me move forward.

3. Discover and resolve unfinished business

If you have any regrets, or have left something undone, whether communication or work, do what you can to finish. If you are unable to finish with someone in person or by phone, try writing a letter, even if you don’t send it. If it’s work that isn’t done, sometimes the other party doesn’t actually want you to complete it as funds, time, or interest has run out. This may not affect your own need to finish the work. If so, inquire more deeply. What is important to you about completing? What are the consequences if you don’t complete? Look for ways you can finish and respect your own feelings and needs.

4. Offer appreciation and gratitude for what you have received from others and through your own efforts

The previous steps bring to mind those who have helped us, cheered us, taught us, been companions, and those who made us confront the error of our ways. We remember the times when we persevered, floundered in confusion, and relished accomplishment. Often, we weren’t alone. As you feel the gifts others have given you, take time to thank them. Remember to appreciate the work you did and effort you made as well. Sometimes offering yourself genuine appreciation can be much harder than offering appreciation to others.

5. Take time to experience this space, clear of past obligations and what has been; be patient with not knowing

After clearing the past, a rare silence grows. The space between the out-breath and in-breath; it can be short or much longer than you anticipated. It can be hard to be there if you are anxious about the future and worried about what comes next. If you can be patient with not knowing what the future holds, and confident that the work of the past has planted seeds for the future, you can begin to get a sense of your new beginning. This step is essential, often uncomfortable, often avoided, and yet it offers a rich harvest of insight and new understanding if you stick with it. What comes up for you in this space between what was and what could be?

6. Clear what you no longer need

At each stage of our journey we acquire information, ideas and things that go with that part of our life. As you move away from the past, let go of what you no longer need; move it on to those who can use it now. As you release the things that no longer provide support it frees both space and energy for what’s coming next. Here’s a link to get you started from Zen Habits

7. Pay attention to when you are happy and to what people appreciate about you

Once you shed the habits of your old life, other sources of happiness and new ways of appreciating what you bring start to appear. Log or note when you are happy and what was going on. When someone thanks you or appreciates something that you’ve said or done, make a note, and find out more specific information if you can. When you feel happy and strong you are probably using your strengths. When someone else offers thanks or appreciation, they are likely responding to one of your strengths. When we spend 20% or more of our time using our strengths, doing what we do best, we’re much more likely to be happy. Learn more about the importance of operating from your strengths at Marcus Buckingham’s website . You’ll want to have as many options as you can for using your strengths in your new beginning.

8. Think about who you want to work with; acknowledge what you bring

As long as you are heading toward a new beginning, think about who you’d like to work with, and then think about what you have to offer. Dream! If you could work with anyone, who would it be? Why? What would that situation offer you? What might they need? What can you offer? In this TED talk Charlie Hoehn, a young graduate now working with Tim Ferris, delivers a funny and relevant rant about going after what you want, and not settling; inspiring whether you are 17 or 70. Charlie Hoehn at Carnegie Mellon TEDx 

9. Preview your new adventure

Find a tour guide for your new life, someone who’s been there, done that, who inspires you, and find out what it’s been like for them. Even if there’s no one around doing just what you think you’ll be doing, you can usually find people who do similar things, or parts of what you are interested in doing. Don’t forget to ask what they wished they knew when they were beginning. Sometimes you really can learn from others experience.

10. Discover where your life is calling you to step up

When one stage ends and another begins we discover our “edges” are new. Areas of challenge in the past have become mastery and faded from attention, and previously unsuspected challenges pop-up. Are you called to engage more fully in an area of your life that’s been neglected? Are skills that haven’t been used much, even though you’ve enjoyed them, now in demand? Are you ready to do something you’ve been longing to do? Is it time to tackle something you’ve put off?

Here’s to your new adventure!

Join the conversation and share what you’ve done to get ready for a new beginning. What’s worked? What hasn’t? Share any questions too.